Saturday, September 09, 2006

It's such a blah day that this post is untitled

Today was one of those blah Saturdays; I had a lot of writing to do, but I knew it was the kind of day when no inspiration would strike. That was fine, as some of the composing I need to do is really more like arranging (just rearranging musical material that already exists), which can be done on this kind of blah day.

I made a blah dinner - ground turkey in a sauce over baked potatoes - and we watched some blah television - we couldn't manage to find anything that would hold our attention. Not an episode of Eureka, which is a SciFi channel series that combines Picket Fences, The X-Files and Real Genius; not a classic Star Trek episode ("Charlie X" which is early enough in the series that everything looks slightly askew); not a random skimming of live TV which produced In Her Shoes, a chick flick which posits a universe in which Toni Collette and Cameron Diaz are sisters, with Shirley MacLaine for a grandmother.

Certain things are gnawing at me: one is trying to find a third actress for the three-woman musical that we're presenting to producers next month. You wouldn't think it would be so hard to find an outstanding thirtyish to fortyish actress with a strong personality and decent voice - actually it's easy to find them, but the good ones are all snapped up on the dates you want them. We've been through eight so far, and still going.

Another is just the general malaise of trying to exist in a world where Disney is foisting garbage such as their Clinton-hating fantasia (I won't utter the name) on the public, with reckless disregard for the truth.

Another is a letter I have to write to my father, to whom I have not spoken in about three years. It's a long story. I'm not interested in reliving it right now, but the sooner I write the letter, the better. Short version: after a long silence, he e-mailed me. I want to respond, but so many other things are occupying my brain right now that I can't focus on it to the degree the task requires.

And finally, today I suggested to one of my students that she consider leaving the program. Monday. Another long story - suffice to say this has been a long time coming. I think David doubts that I can really stand up for myself in this situation; but I'm too exhausted to be anything but upfront any more. Tiptoeing around people takes such energy. I can't do it.


Blogger David said...

Oh dear. I didn't think you couldn't stand up for yourself, only that your actions do not take into account the horrible weight of her insanity. In any case, the dinner was not so blah.

7:01 PM  

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