Friday, April 01, 2005

Oh yeah, April Fool

It's April Fools Day, which used to be my favorite holiday. I've always been fairly deadpan... I made wicked use of this every April first. I would sit at my office drone job, calling my unsuspecting friends at their office drone jobs, and after "whaddya doing ... nothing, just working" crap, would spring my trap.

Sometimes, it was that an opportunity had come up to move to London, only I needed to do it next week and this was a good-bye call.

Other times, it was that I had decided to get married in a green-card arrangement. Or I had decided to give up theater and move to Alaska to finally pursue my dreams of studying archaeology. There was a grain of truth in all of these things, which is why my friends usually fell for it hook, line and sinker.

And somewhere mid-freak out, I would say, "Man, I am so crazy with all this going on, I don't even know what day it is." And then I would ask them, what day is it?

And then the hatred would pour forth from the phone. And I would giggle like a madman. It got the point where my friends didn't take my calls on April 1.

One year, I was calling my ex-roommate to commit my yearly batch of telephone shenanigans. I was talking about two of our mutual friends, male and female, who had been dating, much to the surprise and disapproval of us all.

"They set a date!" I said, acting all shocked and dismayed and can-you-believe-it-ed. "They're really going through with it!" We went through the stages of grief together - denying it, being pissed off about it, wondering if we could bargain them out of it, and then accepting it.

And then I had to admit, I had forgotten what day it was. What day was it ... ? And the hatred, oh the hatred. Tee hee.

Hoo boy, was the joke on me when they did set a date, much to our surprise. And I felt like a shit for having joked about it.

My ex-roommate and I were at the wedding. We pretended that I had never made a mockery of it. I stopped making my annual April Fool's calls. I felt like I was starting to affect my karma (although I have yet to receive a job offer that would take me to London, much as I would love one.)

The marriage was troubled; it has come to a quiet end, eleven years later. I still think back on my office drone days, making my prank calls, thinking I was so damn funny.

Man, I am so crazy with this blog, I've forgotten what day it is. What day is it?

3 Comments:

Blogger David said...

Sweetheart, I'm moving to London and not taking you.

5:22 AM  
Blogger Sherry said...

And what he hasn't told you is that he's coming to live with me :)

You can break the news to Dan!

If you do get up to mischief today let us know!

5:27 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

piano roll ...

It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood a beautiful day in the neigborhood ... b

12:06 PM  

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